I consider myself a country girl, and until now I didn’t realize just how much that has altered the way I think about things.
You couldn’t see my house from the road. I’ve never had a garbage disposal. Trash was separated into “burnables” and “chicken slop” – with very little actually going into a black traditional bag. When I heard a shot and it wasn’t deer season, I assumed there was one less groundhog digging holes for me to trip in. Alleys are hayfields. You watch for deer when you’re driving, not kids on bicycles or grandmas walking their dogs. You play your music and holler at your family as loudly as you want to ’cause nobody can hear you anyway. Locking your car door in your driveway isn’t even something that crosses your mind.
Now I’m married, living in a duplex, and struggling to find a balance between wanting to open all the curtains to let the sunshine in and realizing that people can SEE IN MY HOUSE. Needless to say, it’s been a learning curve. Here’s what I’ve learned in my first two weeks 🙂
I learned that a boil alert didn’t mean there was a chance that your water could get really hot in your pipes, only that you should sterilize your water before drinking it. Oh, and I’m told that somehow the water still magically comes if the power goes out – no more filling the bathtub when it storms.
I’m still skeptical about that one, it hasn’t happened yet.
Trash day was a whole new adventure. Not wanting to be the new kid on the block who doesn’t know where to put her trash cans, I peeped out my window at all my neighbors to see whose trash-can-placement I should copy. Only nobody had put their cans out yet, so I decided to risk it. In the street? That can’t be right. The yard is a slope, they’ll just roll in the street if I leave them, so that won’t work either. I settled for the sidewalk, before realizing that I didn’t even know which way to face them – lid opening in or out? Oh there’s instructions on the lid (yes, I read them) but it only says to “space the cans 3 inches apart”. Thanks, trash man. About 3 hours later I peek back out the window to see everybody else’s trash can sitting primly *in the street*, so I had to nonchalantly sneak back out, move them and anybody watching didn’t think I was a total idiot.
Yesterday evening I was doing some baking. (No apron, so I tied a bath towel around my waist – necessity is the mother of invention). I realized halfway through that my flour container wasn’t blessed by Elijah and there was no way I was gonna stretch the 14 cups I needed from the 5 pound bag I had. See, in my mama’s kitchen we have a 5 *gallon* bucket in the basement, so instead of a trip to the store it’s a trip down the basement steps. No problem, I’ll just use my phone to route me to the save-a-lot (since I still don’t know where anything is in this town. -_- )
Washing up dishes after, and I pulled the plug to drain some water so I could rinse. (One hole-er sink) Replaced the plug, but my rag promptly disappeared. I felt around in the bubbles for a good 30 seconds before tentatively reaching down the garbage disposal. Stupid thing sucked it right in – no wonder my dad replaces so many of those. Thankfully I hadn’t turned it on – I swear one of these days I’m gonna shred a spoon by accident.
“He who learns to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused.” ~ Shirley MacLaine
I’ve been laughing a lot 🙂
xo,
Rachael
Wide Awake 